I won’t accept your apology.

For the love of god do not say sorry.

I have lived through the story.

You let me beg for a chance to live,

I tried over and over to give and give.

You took a piece of my lively soul.

You old actor, your stage is awful.

You made me look sick, it’s unlawful

You drugged me since I was three.

You did this with sickly glee

Then your son took my innocence at four

Until eight when I was old enough to know more

Easy target I was to him, no one would know his sin

That is what happens when you’re merely a foster kid

Then he moved, someplace far away from there

It doesn’t matter though the mental scare fared

In my mind to start the rest of mental duress

You’re a liar, nothing but full of stories

Don’t worry lady I can hold on to everyone’s worries

Let’s talk about the drinking you let him do

In front of us? Don’t you know kids are like glue?

He was trying to forget erase this and that

Like tit-for-tat but you don’t get the last laugh

It’s enough for us kids to see you fight with him

your sense of power whoever you could dim

I hold no memories of the smell of clean

You hoarded and loved the power of mean

Filthy is what our life was from a young start

But lady bloody hell do you ever play the part.

You had everyone fooled to think I was dumb

Retarded before I could even suck my thumb.

You swore up and down that something was off

You made parents hate me laugh and scoff

Call it what you can you the one that was sick

But we kids were your target you must be some kind of thick

To think that someone wouldn’t’ notice three underfed kids

Who were angry and sad but actually we were scared out of our lids

Then the bladder control thank you for taking another part of me

You liked that it became infected, you waited no I can no longer pee

Right as a grown up I am safe from you, false doctor

You had the medications, the story, and the means, how you never falter.

Let’s talk about the kidnapping I remember it well, do you after all?

Insanely legal as you were guardian another way of control, no way to fall

You took us out of anger played the abused card, you and your farce

You cut contact and hid us well, you lied again pulled stories out of your arse

But you liked it right? That scent of fear and control, you regained your reign, way to care

But no more I am free now and you hate it, let’s not kid can you face it

You tried to kill me but I stood up, I am strong filled with life and grit

So don’t say you sorry because the one thing that happened is you failed

And from that I don’t wish you a dear farewell, because lady our ship has sailed.

Written by Ali Johnson

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