I had all hopes of this blog fazing out by not renewing my credit card. Today I looked at my statement and the payment went through. Amazed by not giving the right information, by some odd chance the universe wants me to continue writing. My labradite pendulum had a message that I needed to push through my self doubts. In meditation, I had been seeing Freya lead me in the direction to finding my true purpose. No matter how much I really wanted to quit there was too many universal forces at play.
Last week I felt defeated by a blood bond who has made it her passion to try and cause chaos. My old self, the hidden girl wanted to quit. We had dreams of walking backwards. In our dreams we held hands back to our mental cage: the cage in which we built during our childhood to deal with mental wounds. I asked the small hidden girl if she was sure this was the right path. To give up once again because the wounds had been opened wide. She looked unsure as this possibly was the path we so often choose instead of facing the fear of darkness. I remember seeing the road looked worn and faded. I have mentally walked this road and metaphysically walked this road to its final resting place. Not only that, but I looked at the hidden girl her face filled with tears, I said to her in the dream “no more child we are free.”
I awoke from that deep meditation place only to have more questions. I needed to seek guidance of forces not from this realm. Choosing to invoke Freya and Odin I called upon them. I offered my growing sunflower, salt, cinnamon, and cedar. I dawned my white fawn mask and took off my clothes. Invoking feels right if I offer my spirit and earthly body in the way it was made. I did two rituals that night one was to cleanse my room of any negative energies meant to cause harm. Opening the circle with elements I began to feel the power flow. Enveloping myself with white light I had a forethought to write down the words flowing in my mind.
I felt that I needed to put cleaned water in my chalice. I placed pink salt in the water with cedar droplets. Stirring in the water these words had come to me.
Oh fearless knight, make things right Stand guard for tonight, basked in moonlight Protect my home, may the wanderless not roam Oh fearless knight, make things right So blessed be, so mote it be.
I had written down the incantation on a white envelope. It only felt right to place the spell under the chalice for a whole day and night. The next invocation that came and with my intentions was for Freya and Odin to guide me down the path of understatement. To guide me to meet the knight guarding my best kept secrets. To unlock my vault of fear. My last request before giving thanks was to guide me in the path of the warrior I have always been & to have the knowledge to accept that fate. In my state of mind I saw Freya and Bridget standing in the mountains with light around them. A raven flew overhead with piercing eyes. My voice had been heard. I gave many thanks for their gifts and knowledge. When I closed my circle I felt different more connected to the elements of my soul than ever before.
Odd things have happened since the invocation. Explanations are beyond rational, but I found I have family I’ve never met who also is spiritual. When anyone brings up my birth giver I feel less attached to react but to continue walking in the path that was made by the universe. My dreams have become clear in messages of things I’ve ignored, and I started to embrace grief as an old friend. Spiritually I feel less blocked in my intuition and inner knowledge. All that was meant to be is happening the signs are there. I was not meant to give up and be defeated by the evil spirit meant to cause harm.
Written by Ali Johnson